The Adventures of One-sock Carter

Newest Curse

2009-07-10T23:17:00.003-04:00

Remember I told you how I have been coming up with some really bad curses lately? I have a new one - it's REALLY bad. It's fun to say, because everyone gets so worked up about it. It makes my mom mad. My dad smiles a little, but then he acts mad at me, too. It's so bad I don't even want to write it, but here it goes:

"You're a stinky butt crack."

It's a great thing to say to my brother and sister when I'm mad at them!

Perseverance

2009-06-20T19:45:00.002-04:00

Curses!

2009-05-26T20:39:00.002-04:00

Sorry it has been such a long time since my last post! I have been very busy lately. One thing I have been busy with is working on new bad words. Remember I told you about how much I loved to say stinky? I am so over "stinky" now. My latest curse phrase is "Shut your butt up!" I love this one because it combines two really bad things--"shut up" and "butt." I even tried it on my mom, but it didn't go over too well with her...

Big Boy Backpack

2009-04-30T22:29:00.005-04:00

Since I am a big boy now, I have to wear a backpack to daycare. It drives my Mom crazy, because I have to put it all the way on my back before I get in the car, then take it off to get in my carseat. Then I have to put it on again to walk into my daycare.

It doesn't matter that the only things in my backpack are Red Power Ranger, an ancient baggie of cheerios, and a picture I made with painted macaronis on it. It's all about the cool factor when I walk into daycare. Oh, yeah, and the backward hat. That's the finishing touch.

My new favorite word!

2009-04-20T21:35:00.004-04:00

Stinky. It's my new favorite word. I love it because it's just bad enough to get people's attention, but funny enough to make them laugh. I don't get spanked for using the word stinky, so I use it often. And it's such a versatile word - here are few examples: "Hi, stinky Mommy!" "I farted, it's stinky!" "Your butt is stinky!" "Whatcha doing, stinky Grampa?" And when all else fails, I just start chanting "stinky, stinky, stinky" as loud as I can while jumping up and down. Mom said this is a just a phase and soon I'll get tired of saying it...maybe, but for now I think it's the best word ever!

Tower o' Pillows

2009-04-12T22:05:00.002-04:00

Check out my pillow tower! I love to take the couch apart and make a tower, then dive into it. My big brother likes to do it with me, too. It makes mom crazy - she is afraid we'll get hurt. But we know what we're doing!

Little Composer

2009-03-28T19:52:00.004-04:00

Sorry for being so out of touch lately - I've been busy working on my masterpiece. You see, my big brother and big sister both play piano, and I can't bear to be left out of anything that goes on around here. So I have been climbing up onto the piano bench every chance I get to practice. I'm going to be just as good as they are!

My Cake

2009-03-17T20:52:00.003-04:00

I had a special Hot Wheels cake for my birthday last week...

And boy, did I like it! (This is my new smile, by the way. I do it for every picture. Mom says it's actually a grimace. But I say it's a smile.)

It's my birthday! It's my birthday!

2009-03-09T21:09:00.004-04:00

Guess how old I'm turning tomorrow??

And I finally figured out how to hold my fingers in just the right position...just in time for my big day! Now when people ask me how old I am I'll just flash them my nifty three fingers sign.

Tomorrow my mom is sending cupcakes to my preschool class - vanilla with chocolate frosting. I'm the luckiest kid ever!

Just Relaxing

2009-03-02T20:12:00.003-05:00

After a long day at preschool, I enjoy coming home and relaxing in front of the TV dressed like a Power Ranger. It's a great way to unwind. I think my dad should try it, too.

I like 'em big, I like 'em chunky!

2009-02-26T21:06:00.006-05:00

My new favorite song to sing is "I like 'em big, I like 'em chunky!" Let me explain. Have you seen the movie Madagascar 2? It's a funny movie about the adventures of Alex the Lion, Gloria the Hippo, Marty the Zebra and Melman the Giraffe who were trying to return to the Central Park Zoo but end up in Africa.

In the movie, Gloria the Hippo has a date with Moto Moto, another hippo. He likes Gloria for her chubby body. He sings this funny song to her, I Like 'Em Chunky. So ever since I saw it, I have been singing the song constantly.

"I like 'em big, I like 'em chunky!"

But I have learned that singing this song at the top of your lungs in the waiting room of your big sister's orthodontist is not cool. Especially when most of the adults there have not seen Madagascar and have no idea why a two-year old would be screaming "I like 'em big, I like 'em chunky." Oops.

It's Been a Long Week

2009-02-22T22:27:00.005-05:00

Mom was home with all three of us kids this past week for the school break, and now she probably can't wait to get back to work. She said that I was challenging this week. I don't know what she means by that...

Anyway, the other day I figured out something cool - if you put cheerios on the floor you can take a match box car and crush them up. It makes cool crumbs that you can spread all over.

But even better than making the crumbs is sweeping them up. That's why I did it in the first place - I really like to sweep.

Dancing with Sis

2009-02-15T14:33:00.002-05:00

Yesterday my family did a lot of dancing in the family room. Here is a video of me and my sister dancing!

I like spinach?

2009-02-10T19:56:00.005-05:00

My mom really cares about us. After a long day at work, she picks us up and makes sure we have a good, homecooked meal. She doesn't take us to icky places like MacDonald's! Like tonight, for example, she made spinach salad with orzo and chicken. It was so good! And guess what? I actually ate it all. I am not even three yet and I like spinach!

(Okay, I have to admit that my mom made me write the last part. I did like the chicken and the orzo, but let's be serious - I picked the spinach out!)

Animal Crackers in my Soup!

2009-02-09T22:04:00.002-05:00

Animal crackers...tasty snack,

or fun toy to play on the floor with??

Help! The Car Wash!

2009-02-08T22:05:00.006-05:00

Oh, no! Not the car wash again! Maybe if I cover my eyes it'll go away!

That's a girl, Mom!

2009-02-02T18:06:00.004-05:00

Today Mom let me eat my sandwich on the rug. She finally learned! (in my last post you can see what happens when I don't get to eat in my favorite spot.)

Dad accused her of sending me mixed messages. She can send me whatever kind of messages she wants -- as long as I get to eat my soynut butter and jelly on the rug.

Let me eat on the rug!

2009-01-31T16:05:00.004-05:00

This is my family room. It has a great brown rug in it, which is my favorite spot in the whole house to sit down and have a snack. It's soft and cozy, and I can even watch TV while I eat. You can't beat that!

This is me yesterday, when Mom wouldn't let me eat on the rug. I had to sit in my high chair for my soynut butter and jelly sandwhich. I can't believe she wouldn't let me eat in my favorite spot. How rude!

Hot Grilled Cheese!

2009-01-26T19:00:00.003-05:00

Yesterday Mom made grilled cheese for lunch. It was yummy! But it was also very hot. So I blew on it. I don't know why, but everyone laughed at me and made a big deal about it. Here is a video of it. Maybe you can let me know what was so funny about it. (Make sure your volume is turned up!)

No naps!

2009-01-24T21:51:00.005-05:00

Why do kids have to take naps? It's not fair! Taking naps is so boring when there are so many other fun things I could be doing. So I have come up with some fun ways to avoid going to sleep. Sometimes I pretend that I am going along with the whole nap thing - I lay down with my blanky and my stuffed animal - but then as soon as Mom walks out of the room I start calling her really loud. "Mom-eee!" She always comes back.

Other times I make her rub my back. She is actually pretty good at it. The problem with this nap-delaying technique, though, is that it feels so good that sometimes I actually do end up falling asleep from it...That's what happened at nap time today. I had no intention of going to sleep, but after a few minutes of back rubbing--well, I just couldn't help it!

The other thing I have been doing lately is asking for a snack as soon as she puts me into the crib at night. You see, Mom hates the idea of putting me to bed when I am hungry. So does Dad. If he hears me ask for a snack at bedtime he tells Mom that I should get one, otherwise he thinks I'll wake up in the middle of the night hungry. So, the minute I ask for the snack, just like magic we rush downstairs and I get a cracker and milk. Perfect! Then, she has to help me brush my teeth again, of course. Another ten minute delay (at least ten minutes. Check out my post on teeth-brushing from a few days ago and you'll see what a long time it takes!)

There are so many ways to put off going to sleep if you are smart enough. And cute enough. Just ask my mom.

The New President

2009-01-20T22:05:00.006-05:00

Tonight my parents were glued to the television. They were watching our new President! I know what he looks like, and every time I see him on the TV I yell out "O-Ba-Ma!" Mom and Dad just laugh. Then, to make them laugh even more, I sometimes add, "Yes We Can!"

Mom and Dad said that today was a good day for America. I think it was a good day because I got to play with my friends at pre-school and eat chicken nuggets for dinner. Oh, yeah, and because my Mom cuddled with me while we watched the naug-ral parade. I don't know what a naug-ral is, but I love parades!

California Dreamin'

2009-01-17T22:40:00.004-05:00

It's cold. Really cold. We haven't left the house in days! I wish it was summer. In the summer we always go to the beach--I can't wait to go back! You can probably tell from this picture that I really love the beach! Mom says it's going to be a real long time til we go back...guess I'll just have to wait.

Time to Brush

2009-01-13T21:44:00.010-05:00

I love to brush my teeth! I have a whole teeth-brushing ritual. Here are the rules:

1) I have to use the green toothpaste. Only the green toothpaste. If someone happens to accidentally leave that icky blue stuff in my bathroom, then I have to send my mom to get the green toothpaste back.

2) I have to squeeze the toothpaste onto the toothbrush myself. Mom usually tries to help me--she's always mumbling something about how it can't be any bigger than pea-size, and she seems all worried that I am going to squeeze too much. But I never let her help me.

3) I have to brush all by myself. Mom can take a turn only after I have brushed for a long, long time.

4) I have to spit. Spitting is the most important part of the whole teeth-brushing experience. When you spit, you have to put your whole body into it, like this:

Who knew brushing your teeth could be so much fun?

Cookies!

2009-01-11T19:47:00.002-05:00

My favorite cookie...the "Nuffa Lafer"...

Just Chillin'

2009-01-09T22:12:00.001-05:00

Pop a few pillows into a Rubbermaid bin and you've got a pretty great place to relax and watch TV...

I Go Basement!

2009-01-07T22:54:00.009-05:00

If anyone in my house opens the door to go into our basement at any time, I go "nuts," according to my mom. You see, there's lots of fun stuff down there, and if my parents or my brother or my sister are headed down, I will usually start yelling things like "I go basement! Wait for me!" In other words, nobody better even think about going down without me.

Sometimes, they try to sneak down. I often catch my mom trying to open the door very quietly-- but it squeaks, so she is not usually successful. I will come running any time I hear it. Mom says it's kind of like when a dog comes running if they hear food being poured in their bowl. I just can't help it.

There are so many cool things that they keep stashed down there! There are video games, my brother's Nerf guns, a box full of little green army men... And there are also all the noisy toys that have been banished down there, like my fire truck that makes five different cool siren sounds, or the Tickle Me Elmo doll that my sister says creeps her out. It's like Christmas and my birthday wrapped into one! Uh-oh, gotta go - I think I hear that door squeaking!

Gimme the Dough, Lady!

2009-01-05T21:54:00.004-05:00

Mom made pizza last night and I kept crying and stomping my feet til she gave me a chunk to play with. This stuff is better than Play-Doh!

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T15:56:00.005-05:00

I had a fun New Year's Eve! This is me in my New Year's crown with my noise makers. We had a few friends over and played games and had fancy snacks. I feel a little sick today because I had way too much sparking grape juice. But I got to drink out of a real champagne glass, so it was worth it! Have a great New Year!

The greatest toy ever

2008-12-29T20:39:00.004-05:00

I got lots of cool presents this Christmas, but there is nothing that can beat my favorite toy of all--my pink and blue shopping cart. It used to be my sister's (that's why it's pink), but now it's mine--all mine! I pretty much push it around the house constantly. It's a very versatile toy. These are just some of the ways it can be used:

1) I can load all of my toys into it, and then dump them all out in the most annoying places, as my mom likes to say. Such as the kitchen floor, or at the bottom of the stairs, or in the toilet.

2) I can wear it like a hat. (though sometimes my neck gets stuck through the bars, which could be se-wious, as the Wonder Pets say.)

3) I can swing it like a weapon (one of favorite things to do.) It can be an excellent weapon to use against my big brother when he is bothering me. But when I do this my dad gets really mad, and says that if I hit the flat screen TV, I'll never see the shopping cart again.

4) I can dump stuff into it that doesn't really belong there. Such as a bag of potato chips I grabbed from the pantry today. Mom got pretty upset with me. Then she put all the chips back in the bag (including the ones that fell on the floor) and told me to go watch TV. She's just no fun.

My FBI Training

2008-12-28T22:05:00.003-05:00

I have a big secret to tell you. I've been in training...for the FBI. That's right - joinging the Bureau is one of my life goals. Dad told me that you have to be in good shape to be in the FBI, so I have been practicing my gymnastics moves. You can see me in action by clicking on my video below:

After my basic training is over, I'll be starting on my extra special spy training. Stay tuned for updates!

Don't try this at home

2008-12-28T00:11:00.007-05:00

This is a picture of a kid on my street, "Chuckie Jones" (not his real name). His mom took this picture of him and is passing it around to other moms in the neighborhood. Whatever he is doing in this picture, it must be real bad, because none of us have seen Chuckie lately. I think he must have gotten grounded.

Anyway, Christmas was great and I have been so preoccupied with my all my new loot that I haven't had time to post lately. My favorite present was my Little Einstein's Pat-pat Rocket, followed by my 24-Pack of Play-Doh. Play-Doh rules! My mom even seems into it. She keeps opening the lids and closing her eyes to take long sniffs, whispering things like "mmm, this smells just like it did when I was a kid." She is so weird.

A few examples of why boys make their mothers crazy

2008-12-20T23:14:00.006-05:00

Mom showed me a few pictures today and said I was NEVER to do any of these things, or she would lock me in my room forever. Whoa! Apparently she doesn't realize I have already done a few of these things...

Ginger Bread Houses, Oh My!

2008-12-17T22:22:00.007-05:00

My mom decided the other day that it was finally time to have us kids make the ginger bread house from the kit that Grama gave us. For some reason Mom didn't seem happy at all when Grama first gave it to us, and I even caught her trying to hide it in the junk room in the basement. But my sister kept begging her to let us make it, so finally she agreed. She set everything out on the table--the pieces of ginger bread, the icing, and all the tiny little candy pieces. I couldn't wait to dig in!

Then, Mom actually tried to pull a fast one on me - she let my sister and brother sit up at the table and she tried to stick me on the floor to watch Barney. Ha! Did she really think I was going to sit and watch Barney while there was candy and sticky icing to play with? Honestly, Mom!

First, Mom built the house by gluing the walls together with icing. The directions said to wait in between each step so the icing could dry, but she said we didn't have time for that. Maybe that's why the walls kept collapsing. Finally, she got it to stay together by using something called Super Glue, and she mumbled a lot of bad words the whole time.

The best part was when she spread icing on the roof and we got to stick the little candies on. My brother and sister were trying to make fancy patterns with the candy, but I prefer to make more random designs. My brother kept trying to trick me by saying "Look! It's Santa Claus" and pointing in the other direction. I was pretty sure he was taking my pieces of candy off when I turned my head, but what was I going to do? I'm a toddler - if someone says Santa is in the other room, I'm gonna look! Anyway, after all that work, I think the ginger bread house came out pretty beautiful, don't you?

The Ice Storm and other happenings

2008-12-16T20:51:00.004-05:00

We had a big ice storm last week. It seemed to make my Mom and Dad in a bad mood, but I loved it. The power went out and I got to play with the flashlights! My Dad just paced around the house mumbling about not having something called a generator, and my Mom got real nervous because we were almost out of diapers and the grocery store was closed down. But the power came back on the next day and it was all okay.

My brother and sister and I played some really fun games because we couldn't watch TV. Sometimes my big brother puts on his Darth Vader costume and I put on mine and we have light saber fights! We did this when the lights were out and the light sabers lit up the living room. The best part is when I put on my Power Rangers cape with the Darth Vader mask and I become Power Darth! Or maybe it's Darth Ranger. Either way, he's my favorite made-up character. Better watch out or I'll bring you over to the Dark Side with my powers!

I am so loved

2008-12-13T23:04:00.004-05:00

It's great being the youngest. I get lots of attention, I get to watch the TV shows that I want to watch ("Turn off Hannah Montana so that your brother can watch Blue's Clues!"), and I always get to go first. I like to go first.

Sometimes it's hard being the youngest, of course. I have to wear hand-me-downs, and I don't always get to do all the fun stuff that they get to do. But I wouldn't trade it for anything.

By the way, I have to tell you about this neat trick that I figured out. It's called "having a tantrum." At least that what Mom calls it. If something is happening that I don't like, I start to scream and fuss. It's that easy!! Here is a picture of me doing it when Mom was trying to put my jacket on. It was a nice day, and I did not want that jacket on! So I had one of the tantrums, and it worked! She gave up!

The Case of the Flying Poop

2008-12-10T21:41:00.011-05:00

I love the TV show Wonder Pets. If you haven't seen it, you should. It's all about the adventures of three pets (guinea pig, chick, and turtle) that live in a school classroom and heroically save animals in trouble after school's out. Mom says it has really good messages, whatever that means. One of my favorite books to read when I am on the potty is my Wonder Pets book:

My favorite part of the story is where the Wonder Pets try to save a baby chimp lost in outer space. But this morning I noticed something unusual about this page in the book. So I asked my mom--"What's that?" "A comet," she said. "Comet?" I asked. Hmm...I don't even know what the heck a comet is, but I knew that thing wasn't a comet. See for yourself:

Anybody who knows anything can see that it's a piece of flaming poop, flying through outer space! I told my Mom, but she just laughed and grabbed the book from me to show my dad. "He thinks it's poop!" she cried. For some reason, she was crying and laughing at the same time when she told him. What do you think? If you're still not sure, take a closer look:

That my, friends, is one hot, fiery piece of poop. I hope it's not aiming at the earth. That would be se-wious!

Full House - I could do that

2008-12-09T18:00:00.000-05:00

My big sister is 10 years old, and she loves to watch that old sit-com, Full House. (My mom watches it with her--don't tell Dad, but I think she only watches it because she has a crush on John Stamos.) Anyway, I can't figure out what is behind the success of the show. It's not very funny. In fact, it's kind of corny. And that Michelle Tanner character - I don't think she is a realistic toddler at all. She says things that no respectable toddler would ever say (What kind of 2-year old walks around the house saying "Aw, nuts"??)

I don't want to be mean to poor little Michelle Tanner, but I think I could give her a run for her money. Who's the cuter 2-year old? Be honest.

Guess who?

2008-12-08T20:21:00.009-05:00

When you've got an older brother and sister in the house, sometimes you've got to find a way to get around without being spotted. This is my sneakin' around the house outfit. I think it's pretty effective - who'd recognize me? Certainly not my siblings - they're a little slow on the uptake, if you know what I mean.

Tonight's been a little crazy around my house. I spent part of the evening playing my favorite game with my brother and sister - Baby Jail. I think my sister made this game up. It usually involves me as the main character (are you surprised?) They lock me up in a jail made of couch pillows - it's great! We had to cut it short to get ready for bed, but I am looking forward to more Baby Jail tomorrow...

Well, gotta run for my "bedtime snack." It's this new ritual my mom has come up with. She's under some strange delusion that if she gives me a bedtime snack I'll stop waking up at 3 a.m. asking to climb into her bed. It'll never work, but at least I get some cookies and milk before bed!

I might be the next Emeril

2008-12-07T15:05:00.012-05:00

I must confess that I'm a bit of a foodie. You'd be surprised at how much you can pick up when your mom is zoning out in front of the Food Network. She thinks I'm playing on the floor with my trucks, but I'm really paying careful attention to Bobby Flay. That man can sure grill a burger! But since I'm not allowed to use the grill yet (or even the microwave), I need to stick to the basics. One of my specialities is Cheerios and milk a la One-sock. Mom gives me the bowl of cereal, and then I spill it out - milk and all - on my high chair tray and eat it from there. I guess you could say it's my spin on a traditional dish. You should give it a try--it doesn't taste quite like eating it from the bowl.

For some reason when I made my specialty this morning, Mom got really upset and mopped the whole thing up with a paper towel before I could finish it. She just doesn't recognize my talent for food!

Check out my exercise video!

2008-12-04T22:18:00.003-05:00

Check out my new exercise video - push-ups, One-sock style! The trick to a really effective push-up is lots of head action. Watch the video and you'll see what I mean!

What do you mean they're too small?

2008-12-03T22:25:00.005-05:00

I'm really into Mr. Potato Head these days. I got this cool set for my birthday last year with tons of potato head accessories, including these hot green glasses. Mom told me they're too small for my big head, but I beg to differ. I think it could be a new runway trend.

Muscles

2008-12-02T22:07:00.000-05:00

I’ve acquired quite the work-out habit lately. My Dad is a serious weight-lifter, and he is my greatest inspiration. Sure, as a toddler I don’t have major muscle mass yet, but I’m working on it. This picture isn’t of me (this kid’s got slightly better definition, so I thought I’d substitute him) but you get the idea.

At any given moment, I am known for trying to pry my shirt off (I usually need some help with this) while crying out “Wanna show muscles like Daddy!” Then I walk around shirtless showing off my stuff. I have also learned to do push-ups. Soon all the girls in my daycare will be after me, I just know it. They don’t call me the Baby Stallion for nothing.

The Great Juice Diluting Conspiracy

2008-12-01T22:14:00.000-05:00

I just learned that my Mom has been doing something very sneaky - she's been diluting my juice. I guess she figured that I would never know the difference. But I've recently tasted full-strength juice and let me tell you - I'm never going back to the toilet water she's been giving me. All this time I bought her lies! She would pour my favorite purple juice into my sippy cup. Then she would saunter over to the fridge, put the sippy cup nonchalantly under the water dispenser, and fill it the rest of the way with what I now know to be water. When I would protest, she would say to me, "Oh, no, sweetie, don't worry, Mommy is just making more juice for you. Extra special juice comes from here, and I mix it with the regular juice to make you special-wecial juice!" Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, and I'll karate-chop you. No more baby juice for me!

Let Me Introduce Myself

2008-12-01T21:40:00.000-05:00

Let me introduce myself...I'm One-sock. One-sock Carter. Okay, that's not my real name, but that's what my family calls me. You see, I start the day out with two socks, like everyone else, but somehow I always end up running around the house with just one sock. Sometimes I pull it off because I have eczema and I like to scratch my ankle. Other times I hide it, like in the freezer, just to see what Mom will say.

I have it real good, because I'm two and a half and I'm the baby of the family. I have an older sister, an older brother, and a Mom and Dad who give me lots of attention. Mom says I'm a born entertainer, but I'm really just about having fun. Oh, and getting my way. That's pretty important to me, too. I am two and a half, after all.

This is my blog, and these are my adventures. Later on I want to tell you about the Juice Diluting Conspiracy I just stumbled upon, but I gotta go get my diaper changed. I'll be back later!